




Because little girls get lonely sometimes.





Posted by Ashley at 18:18 0 comments
Labels: about amy, about ashley, ashley, Cooking, Fish, Stock
Last Friday was the Christmas faire at school, which I was required to attend. A few things happened over the course of the evening that I thought were funny or interesting enough to share.
Story 1:
This story requires just a bit of backstory. Thanksgiving day I (of course) had to work, and I was slated to present an assembly about Thanksgiving and what it means to the entire school. I was slightly weepey and missing family that morning, but I thought I was ok. I WAS ok through the story about the Mayflower, and the starvation, and the Indians. I was OK all the way until the story started to talk about how everyone doesn't work and instead drives thousands of miles to spend Thanksgiving with their families. Then I just... lost it a bit. *cough-a lot-cough* I tried so hard not to cry in front of the WHOLE SCHOOL, but failed miserably.
So The Christmas faire has every child and their parents show up. I, being in love with cake and expected to part with some of my hard earned money, made my way to the bake sale and began a conversation with the ladies manning it.
Amy: Oooo! Cake! I'd like that one and that one and that one, no wait, that one - is that blueberries on top?!
Lady behind the Cake Stand: Your accent doesn't sound too familiar - where are you... (insert long dramatic pause here, with expanding ring of silence) Wait - you must be Ms. H - you're the teacher that CRIED AT THE THANKSGIVING ASSEMBLY!!!!!!!!!!!
Other Lady behind the Cake Stand: Oh! Little Suzie* came home and told me all about how you were missing your family and cried in front OF THE WHOLE SCHOOL!
Yet Another Lady behind the Cake Stand: Oh! My Brett* came home and told me all about that too! He didn't know what to do - that's why he doesn't talk to you anymore. Poor dear... aw, bless ** ...
Amy: *sputter, stammer* um...
1st Lady: I cry all the time too, you know (thinking: What kind of baby cries at an assembly? Unheard of!)
2nd Lady: Yes, dearie (patting my hand) we have great big sob gatherings where we just go on and LET IT ALL OUT (thinking: Shocking! What about the stiff upper lip?)
3rd Lady: Oh, and they are so good - we just all gather round and cry and cry and we feel so much better after - and my family is only down Hastings way! (thinking: wonder if my little Brett* can be moved to a less whingey teacher?)
Amy: gulp... *runs away*
*not the child's real name
**bless=something you say about someone who is absolutely so pathetic there really is nothing else you can say. i.e. Little Scooter was an absolute nightmare in class today - he cut Rachel's hair and threw knives at me....bless.
Story 2:
Earlier, I was conversing with a colleague as we sold the goods our children had made, when a man came up to her and started talking to her about buying her orange juice. I had never seen this man before, but owing to the level of intimacy in the conversation, I hazarded a guess and asked her, "Is he your'n?" She looked at me strangely and didn't answer, and I decided that perhaps she was sensitive about it and dropped the subject. Later, after the fateful Bake sale incident, I was again at my booth when one of my students came up to me, so very excited. She wanted me to meet her mum, who was working in the kitchen. I had seen and partially overheard (my name anyway) this person murmer about me as I had passed by on the way to my fateful Bake sale encounter, so I was a bit anxious to meet her as well. The little girl walks me over to the kitchen window, and as we get there, this is the scenario.
Amy: (asking the little girl while pointing at her mum) "Is she your'n?"
Mum: (gasping and getting a horrified look on her face) "Urine? why are you calling me urine? Do you have a problem with me?!?"
Little Girl: Mummy, no, she means are you mine!
Amy: (bright red) Oh, my....
Needless to say, when I asked my colleague, she had thought the same thing. That explains SO much. Urine. Your'n. That's my teaching career in a snapshot.
... I am exhausted to my bones.
That is all.
Posted by Amy at 22:39 1 comments
Labels: amy
... and my first week of teaching in the UK has been horrid, and have had nothing at all to laugh about, and am far too busy to give you all the details and would really like to be able to say something positive when I finally do give you all the details, and because Dar, Dan, and my Mom have all wanted me to say something rather than nothing, I thought I would instead share the only thing that has made me laugh this week.
So laugh, darn you.
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Posted by Amy at 18:05 2 comments