Just saying...

I HAVE been writing... tomorrow I do not work so I might have time to transfer writing from paper to blog.

Consider it a date!

Playing with words

Unfortunately, I didn't write these, but in the spirit of all the writing I'm doing, it seems appropriate.

A Few Punnies...

A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tired.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

A backward poet writes inverse.

A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

If you don’t pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

The short fortune teller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.

When you’ve seen one shopping center you’ve seen a mall.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye.

Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses.

Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of defeat.

Atheism the only non prophet organisation.

Seven days without water makes one weak.

When making whipped cream churn it a little longer, it’s butter that way.

Puns are for younger readers, not for groan adults!

Dyslexic Devil Worshippers sell their souls to Santa.

Two hunters saw a sign while driving which said, “Bear Left,” so they went home.

The mushroom is always the life of the party because he is such a fungi.

Ever hear of Mothers Against Dyslexia? They call themselves DAM.

Protons are positively sure they are not electrons.

A pun is a rare medium well-done.

Day Four

Day Four was a gaming day, so you get a gaming backstory and a day late posting. I am running a StuperPowers game, silly and light but fun. The group has 11 players (!) and this was a first day for the two in the story. This backstory is how they met up with the rest of the party.

On Friday evening, Jon and Laura returned from their holiday in Germany early. Noone was in the house when they arrived, and there was not much in the way of food, so they headed into town to have dinner. On their way to the restaurant, they were surrounded by a large group huge rodent looking things.

Some of the rodents were white, and some were brown, but they were all about the size of a small dog and they were extremely aggressive. Jon and Laura thought that the rodents were going to attack, as they kept nipping at their heels and making angry sounding chitters at them. Jon and Laura moved away from the rodents, but they only circled behind and nipped at their heels again. It was soon obvious that Jon and Laura were being herded by these angry, giant-teethed creatures.

They forced the young couple to the Cathedral, and to a hole in the ground at its foundation, which led to a tunnel. The walk down the gently sloping tunnel was extremely long (about a 45 minute walk) and led to a series of underground rooms that had been dug and well packed. The floors of the tunnels were layered with grasses and leaves, and the smell was earthy and pleasant. Jon and Laura walked through many rough-hewn rooms and down a flight of dirt steps before Laura was separated from Jon and herded into a sterile looking metal room. Jon was herded into a different direction and placed into a different room. Hours later, Jon was taken out of the holding cell and herded by the rodents into a different room where a short young man with crazy white hair (looking decidedly like Albert Einstein’s) strapped him into a chair. The man wore a white lab coat, thick yellow plastic gloves (like cleaning gloves, but much thicker,) and a pair of goggles that made his eyes huge.

He was doused with pink powder, which made his head feel funny and swimmy, and the man talked at him for a long time. Jon didn’t really understand what was being said, but it felt like he knew what he was supposed to do when the man was done. The man then stuck Jon's face into a bag of green powder and poked at him until he screamed, which gave Jon a big lungful of the stuff. After about a minute, Jon began shrinking and felt very strange. He was slowly turned into one of the same rodent things that attacked him!

There was a huge commotion outside, great chitterings and stampeding noises, and the man ran off, leaving Jon alone in the room. He went exploring in his little rodent body, having forgotten that he was anything except a rodent. As he nosed, he found a jug filled with brown liquid on the counter, which he knocked over. It's thick brown viscosity oozed across the counter top and down the side of the counter door. It smelled interesting, and Jon could not help but have a good taste of it. It counteracted the work of the pink powder and Jon realised that he was actually a human named Jon who had been turned into a redent. He remembered Laura, and realised that he hadn't seen her since.

In great haste, Jon scampered around the room looking for a way to escape. Luckily for him, the man had left in such a rush that he left the door open a crack, and Jon took off down the corridor, looking for Laura, or anyone else that could help him find her.

Day Three

Day Three was my birthday, and while I did write, I didn't take the time to post it. So here it is.


Birthday dinner: Mexican food, which is always disappointing. But this place was new, and seemed to know how to make margaritas. They had poppers!!!!! And they were good poppers. The chili con carne was spicy, but they used it as a staple. I had a beef burrito. Inside was the chili con carne. Stephen had chicken tacos. The sauce on the chicken was the sauce from the chili con carne. The margarita... well, it didn't suck, but it also wasn't wonderful. I spoke to the barman afterwards who said it was made with some random silver tequila. Tell me I have champagne tastes, but I like my margaritas with Jose Curevo - gold. Silver has such a delicate flavour that it is lost in the frozen margarita. The barman said that he makes margaritas on the rocks with Cuervo gold - so I might have to try that another day. So all in all - birthday dinner: didn't suck. I guess that it pretty good for Mexican food in England.