B is a putz.
He has decided to be difficult. When I told him Ash and I were moving to England, he told me that he would only not fight me if I dropped the fees, penalties, and back child support that he owes. Telling me that it is not about wanting to keep Ashley here at all, but simply about the money.
I said no. He has controlled me in so many ways for so long, and I am actively working to get out of being controlled by him and K. And if I give into him on ANY LITTLE THING, anything at all, he wins. And I can't do that. Besides, is it my fault that he chose not to take care of his responsibility for 11 years and ended up $50000 in debt to the attorney generals office? No.
So he is talking to an attorney, apparently. Honestly, there is nothing he can do. She is 15, old enough to choose, and she wants to go. Add to that the fact that I have sole custody, and my divorce decree says that I get to choose where she lives...
I'm off to an attorney today, just to be safe.
It makes me really quite angry that he is pulling this, not because of the fact that he is causing problems, that seems to be one of his goals lately: to cause me problems. He is really angry and full of hating me. What makes me so angry is the fact that this is not about Ashley at all. He obviously doesn't care that I am taking her, being so willing to let her go if it hit his pocketbook right. So all of this subjecting her to being placed in the middle isn't in her best interests at all.
When I told Kim, I explained that I had looked at this from the sides of both kids, and told her I thought it was best. She turned to Ash and told her that /she/ would always do what Ashley /wanted/. As a parent, you can't afford to do that. There are times when what is best is not what is wanted, and you do it anyway. It is about what is in your kids' best interest.
As hard as it is to walk away from Boo, as much as I am not doing what he wants... it is in his best interest.
I guess the point is that I have two ex's, with whom I have children, who don't get the concept of what is best for the kids. Its all about what makes them look best in the kids eyes or what is best for the pocketbook.
I think I have done better this time.
determined
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